Crushed by Stink

 woe is me, poor smelly me and in the midst of summer - all I wanted was a shower to remove my bodily stench - the water was off (and is still off at the time of typing) - I rushed around checking the meter, the letterbox for a message to receive a clue or two before ringing the Water Corporation - I hurled myself into my seat to make the call and then the realisation dawned that my reading glasses had just been crushed by my stinky posterior -

 am I just one of the unwashed being mocked by forces unseen? - no, apparently the whole area around my place is suffering the same fate of no water - the wait is now on to lather up my armpits, until then I  must content myself to wallow in my own filth - deodorant, I've never loved you as much as I do now